Melons Facts

So I started this post off thinking it was going to be a letter to the man who broke my heart. But a recurrent theme in both my life and also this blog are my exasperated matters of the heart and so therefore are my escapades into the bottoms of bottles of wine. So. What […]

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Not for Parental Consumption. An Ode to the Sexes; Women Are from Venus and Men Are from F**k Knows Where

Warning: if you are related to me, I suggest you skip this post.  A connoisseur of matters of the heart, you’ll no doubt notice my recurrent theme of the flailings and also the failings of men. The feminist within me wants to discuss more important issues, but here we are yet again; you have to […]

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Late night mash dash

So, Ive just ordered takeaway mash potato to be delivered to my hotel. Yes. I am that girl. I also don’t look like the below photo without the help of good lighting, make up, filters and fat pants. Saucy. So hi! My name is Alex, AKA Melons, the nickname I have been so uncomfortably and […]

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